I just paid a stranger to stroke my face with a brush
....aka I got my make-up done by a professional
..for a wedding
Right, so where did your mind just go? What snap judgments did you make?
Good thing, I clarified things in the second sentence, eh? And giving context in the third meant you knew that this was in no way daily thing in my life!
The extra information I gave helped to restore your initial impression of me, or did it if you’ve kept reading…. I have probably lost those that didn’t open the email.
So in how many of your daily situations are you privy to knowing the full context?
Not that many.
I will demonstrate with a table because everyone loves a table.
Below are real-life examples from my life and people I know. Left column is just bare face fact, middle column is how our wonderful little minds fills in the grey and last column is what was actually happening in the situation.
See, not everything is as it seems.
Also, we all tend to suffer from a great subjective sense of certainty. In other words, we think we're always right. Which means we don’t question our snap judgments.
So how do we solve this? I will share with you what coaches do:
- Become aware of where and when you fill in the blanks
- Drop your initial thought
- Ask questions for context and clarity
In coaching, cultivating non-judgment is key to building a good working alliance where the client feels safe. In your life, practicing to let go of judgment will open up opportunities as you don’t discard options, and will change the dynamic of your relationships.
So if you want a non-judgmental chat about your goals and ideas, contact me here and we can get started, because after all, Now is the Perfect Time to Start!